Posted by: Chelsea Novak | October 18, 2008

Some things just shouldn’t be taped

I wouldn’t call myself one of those women who complain about the specific challenges that only women face. Sometimes the things women deal with, be it through dealing with the things we encounter because of nature, or through the things we deal with to conform to all things proper, are tolerable. Almost never enjoyable, but there’s some kind of payoff. Wearing three inch heels kills the feet and knees, but my god they make the legs look like all kinds of hotness. Sure cramps are about as fun as stabbing yourself in the eye, but many women who’ve become mothers would tell you that all that pain (I’m not even talking about labour here) is nothing in comparison to the awesome that is being a mom.

Sometimes I think we endure painful and difficult things because it’s like a badge on honour. I know there are days when I’m working, coping with cramps, wearing heels, nylons, a tragically ill fitting bra, having gotten up early to blow out my hair, dutifully applied makeup to conceal a bout of insomnia and thought “I am going to be even MORE awesome just to spite all these things that are causing me ire.”

Usually I’m like that. And 99.9 per cent of the time I’m willing in endure discomfort for style, but this evening, I think I found my boundary. It’s called flash tape.

I have this completely gorgeous, red Diane Von Furstenburg dress. Like it’s crazy pretty and it hits me in all the right places. I love it dearly, but the neckline is rather wide and plungey. M is a fan. But it make it look right I have to use flash tape. This is basically clear, flexible tape that you use to make clothes stick to your skin. It works well and keeps undergarments under. It doesn’t offer support like duct tape, which can be used to fashion a bra when a bra just won’t work. It just keeps clothes in place. Yay for that.

However, like all good things, there is a price. It’s just so not fun to take off. Just not fun at all. Sure, it doesn’t tear off skin and such like duct tape can (seriously, if you’ve never used it, please, please, please stick it to a towel before you stick it to yourself. Just please)- it’s a huge improvement – but it’s still not a good time. It’s just never good to mix adhesives and delicate skin.

Such is the dilemma. I’m not willing to go to a formal event and flash my bra all over the place, so I must remember that it’s just another time to be awesome out of spite.



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