Posted by: Chelsea Novak | April 16, 2003

Get out your funbrella Mr. B, ’cause it’s raining style

Mike has often accused me of being a mall lover. A label my inner snob would always scoff at. “Malls are for uncreative shoppers and cookie cutter people,” says my inner snob “and darling, we are neither of those.” For some reason my inner snob sounds exactly like Lauren Becall. Yet despite the wisdom of my inner snob Lauren, I would spend a suspicious amount of time in shopping malls. Trips to big cities wouldn’t be complete without some mall time. And my first visits back to Canada had a mall visit within the first 48 hours. “I don’t like Malls” I would reply to those who called me a common mall lover “it’s just easier to get most of my shopping done there.” I would make argument after argument that I was very adept at street shopping and online shopping. That the only reason I spent time in the mall was because I worked in one for 5 years, so I always found them kind of comforting.

But now it’s time for the truth to come out. I like shopping malls. I confess. I confess like a junkie at an intervention. I like malls. Do you hear me? I like malls. I understand if many of you find it necessary to stop adoring me, but I just can’t live this lie any longer. And god I hate it when Beltzner pegs me like that! And he does it ALL THE DAMN TIME! STAMOS!

Note: In truth I actually adore how well Mike knows me. It’s just scary that he often has my thoughts sorted out before I get to them.

Phew! It’s like weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

So why the confession? I realized that I can no longer hide my mall addiction when my Editor assigned me a survival guide on Prague Malls. That and the fact that I went to 2 different malls last weekend and had SO much fun. In Prague, they’re some of my favourite places to spend my time. Walking from store to store, trying to see what kinds of bargains I can get my materialistic little hands on. One of my favourite things to do is to go to the mall with a set amount of money and see just how much I can skillfully bargain shop out of it. Some people see the malls as one of the inner circles of hell, but not me. One of my favourite places to eat in this city of fantastic dining experiences is in the mall. Horrible I know.

I guess in my defence, I’ve actually lived in the downtown shopping areas of Kingston and Prague, so street shopping was never really a big deal as it just meant walking outside. Going to the burbs and those big towering institutions of shopping look kind of like the Emerald city after driving through Oz.

Anyway, the secret is out and for the next week or so I can totally rationalize all my trips to the mall. Research. He he. (Insert devilish grin).



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