Posted by: Chelsea Novak | September 26, 2002

Of course you realize this means war

Preamble: M, Mike, Andrew, Ian and I are all almuni of the same University and the same humour paper. Recently, Andrew posted on the message board at said paper, putting out a call to other alumni of our era. For all our fights and whatnot, we were a pretty close group of people, so it makes sense that during the month of September we all get a little nostalgic for the parties, the Trasheteria, and (maybe if we have a fever) Press Nite (TM). “Fire it up!”

Issue: So Andrew posts to the message board, looking for alumni. And I know he’s already found me, but I decided, hey I gave 4 years of my life to this paper, 2 of which I was pretty much glued to the office chair, I’m going to stand up and be counted. And what happens. Some sissy-ass “I’m editor or something so I’m king of the known world” type calls us “Old.”

And I quote… “You’re all so old I can actually hear you decrepifying.”

Then bitch-boy goes on to ask us to support his on-going alcoholism…

“On a related note, who is going to be back for homecoming?

The current GW staff will be at ritual on friday wearing each decked out in their special, personalized GW Jersey.

Come see us, buy us drinks.”

1. What makes you think that after you’ve called me old I’m actually going to dish out coin to buy you drinks. I may give you a beating to teach you to respect your elders, but don’t even dream that I would sink so low as to buy you a beer.

2. Dude, we all have jerseys, and we all have crests…and we have “personalized” hats with hippos on them. If I were coming to homecoming at least your “personalized” jersey would help me find you to hurt you.

3. DO NOT call me old two days after I turn 26.

HRH

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